It's all Yours

For those of you who are close to us, you know that our lives have been turned upside down quite a bit lately.  If there's one thing I hate, it's a loss of control.

I've always wondered why I am such a control freak.  Anybody else have that problem?  I think so many dramatic events happened to me as a child, and it left me with a feeling of insecurity.  Now as an adult, I feel secure if I am in complete control over everything whether that be an organized house, finances, the health of my children, etc.  I think we all know that we are not the one in control of a lot of things though.

Recently, our daughter started having some random pain in her right knee.  I just thought she maybe tweaked it a little playing rough with her brothers or maybe even jumping on our trampoline.  Little did I know, that first doctors visit would be the start of a roller coaster of events.  Our first appointment found us going to the lab for some blood work  then heading to x-ray for some images of the knee.  Of course, the blood work came back fine, no infection, as did the x-ray, no breaks.  We were told to give Stella ibuprofen, and call with any changes.  Well, as the days went on Stella continued to wake up with pain in her leg, and even the inability to walk at times.  Back to the clinic we went.  More blood tests, this time for lymes disease, and also a trip to an orthopedic doctor.  This new doctor said it definitely wasn't an injury, and she probably had lymes arthritis.  We just had to wait for the test results to come back.  Wouldn't you know after being treated with antibiotics for lymes, Stella's test results came back negative.  No lymes.  Unfortunately during this time, Stella's right knee had become swollen, so we were sent back to the clinic for more x-rays which showed fluid on the knee this time.  Our pediatrician began to wonder, could this be arthritis?

We were still going through the "watch and see" process, when Stella's pain moved from her right knee to her right ankle.  This took her from walking with a limp, to not walking at all.  Let me tell you, it's frightening to see your two year old go from a running, happy, energetic little girl, to a child shrieking in pain and unable to walk at all!  This new problem was a sign to our pediatrician that we desperately needed to see a specialist.  We needed to stop with all the testing, and we needed to move forward with getting a diagnosis from someone who knew more about this than we did.  The time was now!

Of course we were told by our clinic that we would be able to get in to see a specialist that same week, but when I called the UW Childrens's Hospital, the story was a little different.  We couldn't get in until the next week on Wednesday.  That gave us ten days to try and control this little one with ibuprofen alone.  Fear washed over me at that point.  I didn't know how I was going to control my daughter's pain enough, love on my other children enough, take care of myself enough.  Then this feeling of peace overcame everything, and I thought, now's the time to pray.  We have been given ten extra days to pray, and to seek the One who created this precious little being.

Pray was exactly what we did.  Several of us gathered and prayed over Stella, and even though it didn't take away what was happening, it felt good.  It felt to me like I was finally able to pass the control over. It was like a "Jesus, take the wheel" moment.

Last Wednesday we were finally able to go to the UW Children's Hospital.  Unfortunately, we received no answers, and had a really disappointing experience.  We're not stopping there though.  Our pediatrician has been wonderful, and she wants to fight for us.  She was able to get in contact with a rheumatologist from Iowa City who told us exactly what labs to draw here so that we can hopefully get in to see her there.  We had our last lab done yesterday, and hopefully will hear something soon.

All of this has made me think a lot about control.  We all go through tough stuff in our lives, but if you aren't in a relationship with Jesus, who or what do you give the control to?  How do you not feel so so lost without Him and His love that you don't just turn and run to Him?  I'm not going to lie, this whole thing has really tested my relationship with Jesus, but not once has it ever made me question His love for me.  I know He's got it all under control.

Two things stuck out to me today in my Bible readings.  I'll leave you with them...

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

2 Corinthians 12:10 That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Me and Stella on a good day.  Watching Bucky Badger at the Benton Labor Day parade.

Mini vacation...well, sorta!

If parents of young children take their kids to a fun destination for a couple days is it still called a vacation?  I think maybe it's just a "trip" or "getaway", but it's not really a "vacation" is it?  Everyone who isn't playing "man-to-man" defense with their children anymore is gonna get my drift.  We've been playing "zone" for about 3 1/2 years now, so anywhere we go with our kids is a slight challenge.  Let me explain...

Casey and I have been wanting to take our kids somewhere for a while now, but we've really never done anything but the usual Wisconsin Dells run, Jellystone Park camping, or Henry Vilas Park zoo trip.  I don't really know why, but I think this was the underlying thought, "Can we really take all of our kids on a trip a couple hours away alone?  Yikes!"  Well, this past Friday, we did it!  We left work early, picked up our kids from daycare, and left!  Well, it was supposed to go that smoothly, but when Casey picked up Noah and Stella from daycare, Noah ended up throwing up in our babysitters driveway!  Yes, I am serious!  We weren't about to let that stand in our way though.  We paid for three days in a cabin up north, and darnit, we were going!  We grabbed a big deli bucket, threw it in the van and took off.  C'mon, he looks good enough to go, doesn't he?  He's just squinting trying to make the nausea go away!  : )

 

Stella is ready!

See!  Totally fine!

Well, I decided to drive.  Thank God because Noah decided he was gonna get sick about half way to our cabin, and Casey has much better reflexes than me.  All the puke got in the bucket!  Mess avoided!

The cabin we were staying in was in Warrens, WI.  Let me tell you, I don't know about your GPS, but ours has no idea where that is.  Actually, it could get us to Warrens, but had no idea where our cabin was.  This has nothing to do with anything, but on our way to Warrens, we went through a town called Elroy.  Was there an American Idol contestant from Elroy?  I swore there was, but Casey says "no".  Someone please tell me that I am not imagining this! 

Ok, so we got there...in one piece.  Here are some pictures of us in our cabin.



Caleb and Stella snugglin' by the fireplace.  Yes, I am aware Caleb looks like Kermit The Frog here.





The boys picked me some wildflowers that were growing outside.  How sweet!



Daddy and Noah.  Noah must be feeling better if he can try to make a scary face.



Daddy, don't you know that letting children hang over the rail in the loft is dangerous? 



Our cabin was pretty great!  It had two private bedrooms, and a loft with four beds, a full kitchen with dishes and a dishwasher!  It also had a living room with a fireplace that opened up to the dining room and loft area.  It was just like a house!  Way better than staying in a hotel.  The best part was...these cabins were linked with a hotel so we were able to utilize all their amenities.  The kids liked the waterpark.

 

Probably the best thing about our trip was the air show we got to go see in Camp Douglas.  Of course, our GPS had a hard time getting us there, but we ended up making it.  Betty, as we like to call it, told us to go through a fence.  I am glad we didn't because there were armed people at Camp Douglas.  We had to go through security to even get in the place.  There were cars being stopped and searched too.  Here are some pictures from the air show.

How cool is this one?  It says Wisconsin on the tail!



The trip to Camp Douglas was an unexpected event, and it, by far, was our favorite thing.  We got to see some fly over demonstrations, and one of the pilots names was Chili Dog!  No Goose or Maverick here!  The kids even got to sit in a chopper, and that Wisconsin plane that you saw above, we got to tour that!  We also got some great burgers and hot dogs...yum!

Next, we went to a place called Grandpa Nick's Petting Farm.  I can't say much about Grandpa Nick's except that it was strange.  They had six animals named Butterscotch, and one animal that's name was Duke the Luke.  That's Duke...not Luke.  That's what the tour guide told us anyway.  He was maybe a 13 year old boy.  I think he was just making up animal names as he went along.  I had to try hard not to laugh.  We did see some cool animals though, everything from robo hamsters to llamas...and, yes, they spit!  Oh, our kids got to pet a rooster and feed some pigs.  That was cool!  Here are a few pictures from Grandpa Nick's.  (I really never saw Grandpa Nick, and I am still wondering where he was.)





I forgot to tell you about the hidden treasure trail.  We wanted to do it, but about fifty feet down, Stella got bit by something and flipped out, so we turned around and went back to our cabin.  : )  Here's a picture of the beginning though!  Onward, Noah! 

The little kids were really tired after Grandpa Nick's, so I took them back to the cabin, and Casey took Isaac and Caleb black light mini golfing, and swimming again.  I wanna go black light mini golfing next time.  That sounds cool!

The last thing we got to do at the cabin was make a campfire.  Daddy did a good job too.  The fire stayed lit even after we went inside.  Our poor neighbor campers couldn't even get their fire to stay lit with lighter fluid.  We should've sent Casey over to help them.  Everyone had a fun time making s'mores.  Isaac is a pro smore maker.  I am a pro smore eater!

Well, today brought a whole new set of adventures.  We decided that instead of coming straight home, we would pack everybody up and bring them to La Crosse.  Casey's grandpa is buried there, and we haven't been back since the funeral over five years ago.  So, off we went.  It was only about an hour away from where we were.  We went and saw Grandpa Joanis's old house, and then we took the kids to Chucky Cheese.  I can't believe I am saying this again, but our GPS took us the wrong way...again.  Betty is going in the trash! 

Chucky Cheese was cool.  I haven't been to one of those since it was Showbiz Pizza.  Ya know, with Billy Bob!  Ok, does anyone out there know what I am talking about?  After that, we tried to go to the Mausoleum where Casey's grandpa was buried, but it's closed on the weekends.  I guess we'll have to make another trip during the week sometime.

Homeward bound, and Noah falls asleep.  About thirty minutes into our trip home I say, "Something smells funny."  I even went so far as to roll my window down to make sure the smell was outside the van.  Of course, right after I say that Noah wakes up crying saying, "Have to go to the bathroom.  Waaaaaaaa!"  Oh boy!  We get to the nearest gas station and get Noah out only to find that he's already peed his pants.  Now what?  We have nearly two hours left, and nothing to clean a car seat out with! The only thing I could think of to temporarily cover the seat with was swimming trunks...and it worked just fine.

Now do you understand why I ask the question if a vacation is still a vacation when you bring your little kiddies along with you? 

Vacationing with kids is certainly not easy, but I think one day we will look back at all the chaos and laugh.  Hey, we're making memories.  We may not be world travelers, but that's ok.  Our kids are getting awesome experiences in good old Wisconsin.  Ask them if they had fun.  I bet they'll all have a different story to tell you.  Noah said his favorite part was petting the chickens.  Stella just giggled at it all...

Oh, and one more thing (and my favorite part of the day), somewhere in the country around Bloomington we drove by a place that had a big sign that said "Honk if you love Jesus!"  Because I was driving, I honked a really long honk!  Man, that felt good!  : )

Who are the poor?

Proverbs 19:17 says this, "He who is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and he will reward him for what he has done." 

Poor...Webster's dictionary #1 definition "Destitute of property; wanting of material riches or goods; needy; indigent"  How about #4 "Worthy of pity or sympathy"

How would you define poor? Dirty, useless, lazy, maybe even a specific race _____, you fill in the blank.  Sounds harsh, I know, but if you're honest you've probably used one of these adjectives to describe someone who is poor. 

What happened to me today will forever change the way I think of these people.

My husband is such a rock star.  For an early mother's day gift, he was going to allow me some time to go clothes shopping for some cute summer stuff!  Alone!  All of those mommas out there know how cherished shopping time alone is.  : )  I didn't buy many summer outfits last year because I still felt half pregnant.  Haha!  That's the reality of having a baby.  Sorry, to all of you non-moms out there that think you're gonna have your body back two weeks postpartum.  Hello...reality check!  Anyway, this shopping trip was, according to me, much needed.

I decided that I would start out by going to the Maurices in Platteville.  For those of you who have been there you know that the turn going into that plaza is a pretty busy place!  Well, as I turned that corner I saw a large older gentleman holding a sign that said, "Homeless.  Anything helps."  What!  A homeless man in Platteville!  Are you kidding me!?!?!?!  If I am honest, those were my first thoughts.  I really didn't think there were homeless people there.  Anyway, I tried to turn the corner without making eye contact with him.  After all, I don't owe him anything.  He probably did something to make himself homeless anyway, right?

I pulled into Maurices and parked my car.  Before I opened my door, I had this overwhelming feeling come over me that said, "Why the heck are you still going to go waste your money on clothes you don't really need when there is a homeless man sitting within walking distance of you?"  So, I sat there in my car alone for awhile.  I don't know why, but I decided to drive my car a little closer to the man.  I mean, just because I parked closer to him didn't mean that I needed to get out and help him.  Well, there I was about fifty feet away from this man.  My heart was pounding out of my chest because I knew I needed to do something, but I didn't know what.  All the sudden a song came on the radio by Jeremy Camp.  Ever heard of "Give Me Jesus"?  http://youtu.be/lnfOMvYd1oE  Listen to it! 

That was enough confirmation for me to get out of the car.  At first I thought I should give him the money I was going to spend on clothes, but after hearing that song, I knew all I needed to give him was Jesus.  Well, I got out of that car and walked over to him.  He looked pretty surprised to see someone approaching him.  This is how the conversation went.  Me, "Hey!"  Him, "Hi."  Me, "You know, I don't know if you have a way to get to Dubuque, but if you can find one, there is a shelter for men there.  It's run by a church."  Him, "Ok, thank you."  I smiled and walked away, and as I walked away I heard this "God bless you."  God bless me?  God bless me!?!?!?!  No, not God bless me, God bless him.  He gave me the biggest reality check that I ever could have been given.  Here I am wasting away money on things, things I don't really need just because I feel like it!

Maybe this whole scene feels very simple to you, but it was one of the most impactful things that has happened to me in a long time.  It made me re-evaluate some things about myself.  I don't really see myself as much of a "thing" person, but maybe I am.  Maybe things do make me happy.  Shouldn't Jesus be enough? 

After that, I drove home.  I came home with empty hands, but a full heart.  A lesson learned from someone that I thought would be the last person on earth to teach me one. 

Give me Jesus.

You can have all this world,

Just give me Jesus.

You said what!?!

Ok, 11:07 p.m. and I am still awake.  I should really be in bed, but my mind is running, and when that happens I find it's good to put pen to paper...or whatever you want to call what I am doing.  I guess it's not really pen to paper anymore.  : )

I don't think I've updated you all on our kiddos for awhile, and I must do that because they are changing every single day.  I got some silly pictures of the kids recently that really captured them in their essence...





Noah is saying "cheese" for you.  Can you tell?

 

I think Caleb looks like Popeye in this picture...just sayin'.

Easter Sunday.  Once again, Noah is on strike!



Me and Stella.  She is just the most precious thing ever....ahhhh, love her to death!

Ok, I saved my favorite picture for last.  Me being mauled by my kiddos is an every day occurrence!

I love that all of these pictures come from an album entitled "funnies".  Ok, I guess I will share one more...

I seriously just snorted when I posted this one.  I cannot help but laugh every time I see this.  I'm sure many of you have seen it, but I have to explain more...So, after dinner one night (Subway obviously...the bags are everywhere and there is a piece of sandwich in this picture) Casey left his glasses on the counter.  Not safe with a three year old.  So without our knowledge, Noah grabbed them, put them on, and said in the deepest "dumb" voice he could muster up,"Hi, I'm Casey!"  Oh my were we rolling on the floor laughing!  Ok, here's one more that I wasn't brave enough to post earlier because he's drooling everywhere and looks crazy, but I just have to share it because it makes me laugh...

Yes, this is the kind of house I live in.  Sounds like a Dr. Seuss book, huh? 

Well, now I need to tell you about the little man Noah is becoming.  He is by far the silliest little sneak in our house.  Noah can be very quiet, which is dangerous!  Quiet = bad in this house.  When you don't hear him, it's time to start searching.  You might find him hiding eating chapstick (Burts Bees being his favorite), locked in the bathroom unrolling lots and lots of toilet paper for no known reason, or hiding under a desk eating a popsicle he snuck.  When asked what he's doing he will hide the popsicle, or whatever he has at the time, behind his back and say,"Uhhhh...nofing!"  Yea, right!  Sometimes when you ask him a question he will answer with a snort.  "Noah, what makes you happy?" "Uhhh...(insert snort here)."  Love him to pieces. 

Then there's Caleb, the human sponge.  I didn't know how sarcastic I was until my five year old started repeating things that I've said before...yikes!  I know you are wondering what has been repeated.  I'm cool with sharing too because I'm sure most of you have been in this boat before.  Well, one weekend while I was away my husband called to tell me that Caleb asked him if he could have a piece of "fricken cheese".  Ok, I didn't think fricken was a bad word, but now it is.  : )  Just yesterday Casey farted on me (yes people, it happens in this house) and Caleb looked at him and said, "You freak!"  Freak = bad word now too.  Oh, Caleb.  Mommy is learning right along with you.



Look at this child.  You'd never think anything like that would come out of his mouth.



Then there's Isaac.  Honestly, I don't have much to say about him except he's just a good kid.  Sure he messes up, and sasses back at times, but he's helpful, he loves his little brothers and sister (especially Stella), has a love for music, he does his chores without slacking much, and most importantly he has a love for Jesus.  I am really proud of the kid he's turned out to be and I can't wait to see what's in store for him because I think he could do something really great.  I try to hint that he should go to a Bible college and join a band.  Not sure if he'll buy into that!  Hey, it's worth a shot! 

Last is Stella.  Precious Stella.  It seriously seems like yesterday when she was this little...



Here, she was only known as baby Thompson 4.



Now she's this silly little thing that talks, and has the biggest smile ever.  She says things like "I want more pizza!"  She says "No" really good too.  She's compassionate...when a brother gets a boo boo she says,"What happened?" She gives kisses, and she really likes popsicles.  She calls them pickles, so we're really never sure whether she wants a pickle or a pickle or a pickle.  All which are translated to pickle, popsicle, or cucumber.  Get it?  : ) 

Not to get controversial on you all, but I really have to throw this in there.  There is a Bible verse that says "Don't you see that children are God's best gift?  The fruit of the womb his generous legacy?  I think we have been so blessed with these kiddos, they have taught us so much about love and loving others.  They love us unconditionally, even on our worst days.  I don't know about you, but I really admire the way my kids can love people and show love, even if it's as simple as coloring a picture for someone who's having a bad day.  I wish I could learn to love more like a child.  So, anyway, I believe we were gifted these little ones as are people that adopt children or are foster parents to children even for a short time.  Not a whole lot of gifts are better than that of a child. 

Children are the hands by which we take hold of heaven - Henry Ward Beecher

The Journey Continues...

I think when I started this blog I had good intentions of making it all about my kids and the funny things that happen to us throughout a typical day.  To my surprise, this blog morphed into something more like a faith journey...my faith journey.  I hope you take so much more away from this than you would have from a blog about our kiddos.

It's hard to believe, but this picture was taken one year ago today.  Every time I look at it it stirs up one of the most precious memories to me ever.  I think if you took off those big old sunglasses (which just so happen to be my favorite), you would definitely see some tear streaked cheeks.  I think this particular Sunday will be forever engrained as one of the most powerful days of my adult life thus far. 

I know several of you have read about my trip to California, and how I felt God literally swept me up and changed the direction of my life, so I won't waste your time rewriting that story.  Besides, you can just go back to the old blogs and read about it.  : )  What I do want to share is one particular detail of that day.  It was just the fact that I walked into that church not really knowing what to expect, and I was completely taken over.  If you are a music person like myself, you never forget what song was playing when _____ (fill in the blank).  Ya know what I mean?  I remember walking into church and the song Forever Reign was being performed.  When I say the word performed, I really mean it.  It wasn't just a song sung because.  It was a worship team playing this song with every ounce of their being.  It was a song that was performed for Jesus.  If you have never heard it, you need to.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=au3EGgISYMc&feature=player_detailpage  Isn't that just one of the most powerful songs ever?  When I wrote about the tear streaked cheeks, this song would be what started that.  It was a good thing.  It was the beginning of a powerful journey that I am so thankful to be on.

The one year anniversary of that day found itself being celebrated with the opportunity to play worship music myself.  Doesn't God have the funniest sense of humor?  I had no clue what I would be doing today, but He did.  When that revelation came to me that I would be playing on that very same day, I was so overcome with emotion.  I was literally getting ready for work, trying to put my make-up on, but that wasn't gonna happen because my eyes literally filled with tears.  I know, I'm such a sap, but I couldn't help it because to me that was God's way of showing me how much He loved me.  He knows exactly what brings me the greatest joy. 

I know this particular story was mine, but really, it applies to everyone.  When we pick up our cross and follow Him, so many things that we thought were impossible become possible.  So many dreams that we thought were lost become reality. 

I pray that this Sunday was a blessing to you, that wherever you choose to worship you feel nourished, that the music and message would just permeate your soul.

This is one of the last pictures that I took while I was in California.  It reminds me of something I read once that made so much sense...

I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.  -C.S. Lewis

2011 Reviewed

Well, another year has come and gone.  I can't believe it!  I am not sure if time really flies when you get older, or if it just flies during the period that your kids are little.  Four is certainly a doosy!  Sometimes I feel like I spend my days holding my breath hoping that no one breaks a bone, that those boo boos won't leave any permanent marks, and that no one will come to my door when one of my kids is still in their undies.  Usually someone does come to the door when one is in their undies, and if you are one of the "ones", I am so sorry.  They just don't like wearing clothes.

Well, the year started out with us having a five month old...

a two year old...

a four year old...

and an eleven year old...

I think for those of you who know us well, you would probably say that these pictures are an accurate representation of our kiddos.  Let me tell ya, these kids are something else.  They are always good for comedic relief.  By the end of 2011 our kids morphed into something more like this...



Nevermind the person wearing the crazy glasses in this picture.  I was trying to show you a newer picture of Isaac.  I don't even know who that weirdo is anyway!

 

Our children certainly grew over the last twelve months, huh?  Actually, I think we all had our own period of growth over the last year.  Experts will tell you that a human being learns the most between birth and five years of age.  I think I may be a rare exception to that statement.  I think 2011 was a year of learning for me.  I learned some great lessons in some strange ways.  I think God can use anything He wants to communicate with us.  I learned great things through teachings at church, music, other people, even fortune cookies believe it or not!  I would like to share with you the best things I learned in 2011.

1. Sometimes one must step out and become uncomfortable to reach their greatest potential.
2. You must listen to that little voice.  I call it God, others may call it their conscience.  Either way, listen to it.  I've found that it is always pointing me in the right direction.
3. Whatever it is that you do, do it your best even if you don't feel like it.
4. People are starving for love.  Give it to them.
5. Give, give, give.  Whether that be your tithe, your talents, your time.  Whatever it may be, give.  You always get more in return.  I promise you that!
6. We Were Meant To Be Courageous!  (Thank you Casting Crowns and Courageous movie) If you haven't watched it.  DO IT!
7. There is no need to find significance in material things because God already gave you everything.
8. Women see the world through pink colored glasses, men through blue, but together they see the world in purple.  (Found in the book Love and Respect.  If you are married or plan to be and have not read it, do it.  Thank you dear Melissa for telling me about this.)
9. You will not be able to save every lost person you meet.  You won't be able to bring everyone from A to Z, but maybe you can accomplish A to F, and that's ok.  Something or someone else will bring them the rest of the way, but they will look back and remember that you planted the seed. 
10. If you want the rainbow, you have to tolerate the rain.  (Found in a fortune cookie, and the flip side of the cookie taught me how to say husband in Chinese.  Interpret this how you want.)

Dear ones, thank you so much for being part of our lives in 2011.  I really can't wait to see what 2012 has in store for us.  Hopefully we'll learn even more, serve even more, pray even more, love even more, and maybe through all of this we will be able to change some lives in the way that we were changed.  Love to you all.